Monday, 27 May 2013

Top 10 Firsts That Weren’t Actually First

There are some things in life that everybody just knows, like where the Eiffel Tower is, or why it’s okay to catch a butterfly with your hands, but not a bee. These are examples of the kind of knowledge that is so basic, you just pick it up naturally throughout your life and couldn’t possibly remember where you first heard it. As a result of this, a lot of things we hear are often taken for granted as truth, and some mistakes become so widespread that saying otherwise would make people think you were lying, or stupid. Well here are ten examples of people who are wrongfully accredited with being the first to accomplish something.

10. First Non-stop Transatlantic flight

If you asked someone who the first person to cross the Atlantic was, most would say Charles Lindbergh. And they’d be right. Except that, no, they wouldn’t. While he did fly solo before anyone else, he is often accredited with being “the first person to fly across the Atlantic”. In reality, John Alcock and Arthur Whitten Brown were, just short of 8 years ahead of Lindbergh. Leaving from Newfoundland on July 14, 1919, they two had a pretty rough flight. On 6 separate occasions, Brown had to climb out onto the wings and knock off ice, as well as Alcock having to fly dangerously low in the hopes of preventing the engines from freezing over more. Sixteen hours later, the two of them landed in Ireland. Locals tried to wave them on to a landing strip, but the two men just waved back and crashed into the bog. Not because they’re stupid, because Brown had removed the front wheel to reduce weight and they couldn’t have landed on the runway.

9. The Inventor of the Telephone

Almost everyone still believes that Alexander Graham Bell is the inventor of the telephone. While Bell did patent the telephone in 1876, and started up the first telecommunications business, named after himself, he was nothing more than the inventor of plagiarism (or so he (probably) said). The designs that Bell patented were those of Antonio Meucci, who demonstrated his telephone a full 16 years before Bell patented it. At the time, the Italian immigrant couldn’t afford to pay the $250 fee to patent his designs, and he only grew poorer as time passed. He had showed his design to the Western Union telegraph company, but the executives didn’t want to meet him. He was told his materials were lost and couldn’t be returned, and then 2 years later, his old lab partner Bell had patented them. Meucci sued Bell, but died before a verdict was reached. In 2002, US congress officially recognized him as the inventor, but still he goes largely unknown.

8. Columbus Discovering America

Everybody who has ever taken a history lesson knows that in 1492, Columbus set sail from Spain with his three ships, the Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Maria, and “discovered” America. Only the new world wasn’t really that new to some Europeans . Around the year 1000, a group of Vikings, led by a man named Leif Ericson, landed in Newfoundland, which they called Vinland after its grapes. It is most likely that they set sail from a settlement in Iceland, and this site currently remains they only confirmed Viking settlement in North America. There is no shortage of evidence that this is a Viking settlement either: The style of the houses, iron, pottery, a Norse-style pin head and ring for cloaks and much more all confirm Viking settlement. It is estimated that they stayed no longer than a decade, but various expeditions occurred, including one of 160 men and women. Although he only led the first expedition, there is no doubt that Leif Ericson led Vikings to North America around 500 years before Columbus.

7. The Theory of Evolution

A lot of people will probably want to call bull on this one. Darwin must have developed the theory of evolution. That’s why the leading theory is called “Darwinian Evolution”. The truth is not far off really. Charles Darwin was largely influenced by his grandfather, Erasmus Darwin. Erasmus could not really pinpoint how life evolved, but he did believe that all life had a common ancestor, and that we changed over time. He wrote a poem to this effect:
“Organic life beneath the shoreless waves
Was born and nurs’d in ocean’s pearly caves;
…These, as successive generations bloom,
New powers acquire and larger limbs assume”
So where Erasmus said change occurred over generations, Charles, in more detail, said that beneficial mutations build up over generations and eventually result in a completely different organism. While it was Charles who developed the idea of natural selection, Erasmus did believe that sexual selection caused change in species. He wrote that “…the strongest and most active animal should propagate the species which should thus be improved”, a concept we know Charles described as “survival of the fittest”.

6. The First Printing Press

This is another one a lot of us will know from history class. The printing press was probably the biggest driving force of the renaissance, as it allowed information to be spread at an exponential rate (at least back then. Now we have instant access to a greater amount of more accurate information on this site alone). This press was developed in 1439 by Johannes Guttenberg, and could make about 240 pages an hour, with fewer mistakes and better quality. But, as revolutionary as it was, it’s a pity the rest of the world didn’t take a printed leaf out of Korea’s book 200 years earlier, because that’s when the Goryeo dynasty started printing books. The printing press was developed for the first time in 13th Century Korea, when the Mongols were destroying their religious texts, and the Koreans were trying desperately to save them. Now, we only have one volume of one book left, called Jikji, but it is still almost 100 years older than Guttenberg’s famous 42 lined Bible. There are some who believed Guttenberg took the technology from Korea, but there’s no way to be sure.

5. The First SOS Distress Call

The Titanic is famous for a lot of things, like sinking on the maiden voyage, not having enough lifeboats for everyone on board, and James Cameron. One thing it should not be famous for is being the first to use SOS to call for help, because it wasn’t. Yet many people believe it was, possibly because it is the most famous ship that has had to call for help, or because there is a certain tragedy in it not working the first time it was used. The truth is, the first wireless distress call was by the East Goodwin Lightship on March 17 1899, and that worked. But that call was “CQD”, not SOS, which was introduced later. But despite that, SOS was not even used first by Titanic. It was used in 1909, by the SS Slavonia, and that was also a successful distress call. Sorry, Titanic. Unlike that iceberg, you just don’t quite make the cut.

4. First Man to Circumnavigate the Globe

Clearly it’s time to replace history books with the internet, because they really are just a big collection of lies. One of the major explorers of his time, most people who know Magellan will think of him as the first man to circumnavigate the world. While his ship did eventually come full circle around the globe, Magellan himself died in the Philippines before the journey was done. While there is really no way of knowing how much of the crew was on board for the whole journey, we can be pretty sure that Enrique De Malacca was. He was a slave of Magellan’s, who was used as an interpreter. While he interpreted Malay, and was picked up in the Malay Peninsula, many people believe he was actually Filipino, where he is viewed as a hero.

3. The First Light Bulb

Yet another entry that seems painfully obvious. Even if you know nothing else about Thomas Edison, you know that he invented the light bulb, and that’s enough. Well, you’re about to know a bit more about him than a lot of people. Edison was nowhere near the first to come up with light bulbs. There were a lot of earlier versions of light bulbs that used platinum, but were consequently very expensive. Sir Humphry Davy (pictured) passed electricity through platinum to create light as early as 1801, 78 years before Edison’s bulb. But Warren de la Rue used platinum in a vacuum, like modern day bulbs, for the first time in 1840. They lasted longer, but were still too expensive to be practical. The first modern bulb was developed by Heinrich Göbel in 1854, and ten months before Edison, Joseph Wilson Swan patented a bulb almost exactly like Edison’s. Yeah, so it’s a bit of a stretch to say he was first.

2. The Big Bang Theory

This one will undoubtedly make a lot of readers angry, and as former US Secretary of State Dean Rusk said “The best way to persuade people is with a long, angry comment on the internet”, so go wild. A Belgian priest, Fr. Georges Lemaitre, proposed the theory of the expanding Universe in 1927, but was unsure about how this could occur, so he met with Einstein to discuss it. Einstein was not convinced and apparently told Lemaitre “Your calculations are good, but your physics is terrible”. In 1931, Lemaitre suggested that the universe had begun from a minuscule point that contained all matter, which he called the primeval atom, which exploded at the moment of creation. That same year, he visited Einstein, who this time was convinced, and said that rejecting it the first time was the biggest mistake of his life. The name “Big Bang” was used first by skeptic physicist, Fred Hoyle, who was actually using the name as a way to make the whole theory sound ridiculous.

1. The First President of the United States

This one is not so much a case of mistaken achievement or a result of the truth being lost to time as it is a technicality. George Washington is and most likely always will be officially recognized as the first president of the United States. But Peyton Randolph was the first president of the Continental Congress, which governed the “United Colonies of America” during the American Revolution, which would go on to become the United States (obviously). A letter to Washington from one of the so called “forgotten presidents,” John Hancock, was signed “President,” and Washington’s reply was addressed to “The President of the United States”. There were no fewer than 14 presidents before Washington. The reason he is considered the first is because the rest never served under the current constitution. But it was because of many of the other forgotten presidents that the US gained independence in the first place, and it hardly seems fair that they be forgotten just because they had to be a confederation to do this. Should every president prior to the entrance of Hawaii be dropped to, since technically they were only president of some United States?

Top 10 Biggest Meteor Strikes In History

Our beloved blue planet gets pelted with debris from space all the time but, since most of it burns up or break apart in the atmosphere, it’s usually not a problem. Even when one does make it to the ground, they are rarely much larger than a small rock, minimizing the damage they’re capable of inflicting.
Then, of course, there is that once-in-an-eon occasion where something very very large makes it through intact, and this can really do some damage. Fortunately, such hits are extremely rare, but they are worth noting, if only to serve as reminders of the power of the stars to undo the normal routine here on Earth, with little more than a few minutes’ warning. So where — and when — did these monsters hit? Let’s take a look at the geological records, and see.

10. Barringer Crater, Arizona, USA

Already the home of the Grand Canyon, around 50,000 years ago Arizona decided to add yet another tourist attraction, when a 160-foot diameter meteorite landed in the northern desert, leaving an impact crater nearly a mile wide and 600 feet deep. Scientists believe the meteorite that caused the crater was traveling at over 28,000 miles per hour when it struck, causing an explosion about 150 times more powerful than the Hiroshima atomic bomb. Some scientists initially rejected the idea that the crater was caused by a meteor when no meteorite was found, but the modern consensus is that the rock melted in the explosion, spreading a mist of molten nickel and iron across the surrounding landscape.
Though at a mile across, the crater is not all that large, the lack of erosion makes it an especially impressive site. In fact, it’s one of the few meteor craters that actually looks like what it is, making it a first-class tourist attraction — precisely as the Universe intended.

9. Lake Bosumtwi Crater, Ghana

When one stumbles upon a natural lake that is almost perfectly round, that’s a little suspicious. Such is the case with Lake Bosumtwi, a five-mile diameter body of water that lies some twenty miles southeast of Kumasi, Ghana. This was created when a 500-foot diameter meteorite hit the region some 1.3 million years ago. Efforts to study the crater closer have been complicated by the fact that the lake is difficult to get to, because of the thick rainforest that surrounds it, and the fact that the local Ashanti people consider it to be sacred (they consider it forbidden to touch the water with iron or use metal boats, making drilling for nickel on the bottom problematic.) Still, it remains one of the best-preserved craters on the planet today, and an example of the destructive power of megarocks from the stars.

8. Mistastin Lake, Labrador, Canada

At a “mere” 38 million years old, the Mistastin crater from Labrador, Canada, is an impressive eleven-by-seven mile hole in the ground which, due to erosion from the many glaciers that has scoured that part of Canada over millions of years, was likely originally far larger than it is today. What’s unique about this crater is that, unlike most meteor impacts, this one is elliptical in nature rather than circular, suggesting that the rock hit at a shallow angle, rather than straight on like most big impacts. Even more unusual is that there is a small island in the middle of the lake which could be the central uplift of a complex crater structure, making it even cooler.

7. Gosses Bluff, Northern Territory, Australia

Equally impressive from both the ground and the air, this 142-million-year old, 15-mile diameter crater, near the center of Australia, was created when an asteroid, estimated to have been a good 15 miles in diameter, hit the surface at an impressive 40,000 MPH, gouging out a hole some 16,000 feet deep. That’s the energy equivalent to 22,000 megatons of TNT, suggesting that life on the continent likely had a difficult time in the immediate aftermath of this little incident. Now one of the most significant impact structures in the world, the highly eroded crater stands as a stark reminder of the power one big rock can have.

6. Clearwater Lakes, Quebec, Canada

It’s cool enough to find one meteor crater, but to find two of them side-by-side is twice as cool. This is exactly what happened when an asteroid split in two upon entering the Earth’s atmosphere some 290 million years ago, creating two monster impact craters on the eastern shore of Hudson Bay. Since then, erosion and glaciers have eroded much of the original craters away, but what remains is still impressive. One lake is some twenty miles in diameter and the other just under fourteen. Given the amount of erosion that has occurred over the last 290 million years, one can only speculate how much larger they must’ve been when first created.

5. The Tunguska Explosion, Siberia, Russia

This one is a little controversial, as it didn’t leave any pieces of itself, making it a source of debate as to what exactly it was that hit this little corner of Siberia a mere 105 years ago. The only thing that’s known for certain is that something pretty big, and moving very fast, exploded near Russia’s Tunguska River in June of 1908, leaving over 800 square miles of forest flatter than a squirrel on the freeway at rush hour. So large was the explosion in fact, that it was detected on instruments as far away as Great Britain!
Since no bits of meteorite have ever been found, some believe the object may not have been a meteor at all, but a small chunk off a comet (which, if true, would account for the lack of meteoric material.) To further muddy the waters, there are also those who contend that what actually exploded was an alien spaceship. While completely unsubstantiated and totally speculative, we gotta admit it’s a pretty fun theory.

4. Manicouagan Crater, Canada

Manicouagan Reservoir, also known as the “eye of Quebec,” was created some 212 million years ago, when a 3-mile wide asteroid hit the Earth. The 62-mile-wide hole that it left has been worn away by the passing of glaciers and other erosive processes, but it remains impressive nonetheless. What’s especially unique about this particular crater is that, instead of just filling with water to become a near-perfect circular lake, this one is mostly dry land, ringed by a natural mote. That would make it a great place to build a castle, one might imagine.

3. Sudbury Basin, Ontario, Canada

What’s with Canada and impact craters? It appears that Alanis Morrisette’s beloved homeland has an inordinate number of meteor craters, with the one near Sudbury, Ontario being the largest of the bunch. 40 miles long, 16 miles wide, and 9 miles deep, this 1.85 billion year old crater is actually home to some 162,000 people and a number of mining companies, who discovered over a century ago that the bottom of the basin is super rich in nickel because of the asteroid. Rich enough, in fact, to provide about 10% of the world’s nickel supply!

2. Chicxulub Crater, Mexico

This is the one that may have done in the dinosaurs, and is one of the largest meteor strikes in Earth’s history. The impact happened roughly 65 million years ago, when an asteroid the size of a small city crashed onto Earth with the destructive power of 100 teratons of TNT. That’s one billion kilotons for those of you keeping score. Compare that to the Hiroshima bomb, which released the equivalent of just 20 kilotons of TNT and you get the idea.
Not only did it leave a 105-mile diameter hole in the ground, but it created mega-tsunamis, earthquakes, and volcanic eruptions around the globe, that dramatically altered the environment and doomed our reptilian friends (along with a lot of other critters, it appears.) Buried beneath the Yucatán Peninsula in Mexico near the village of Chicxulub (after which it is named,) this vast crater can only be discerned from space, which is why it took so long for scientists to find it.

1. Vredefort Dome, South Africa

While the Chicxulub Crater is better known, it’s a mere pothole compared to the 186-mile-wide Vredefort Dome in South Africa, which currently holds the record for being the largest impact crater on Earth. Fortunately, in hitting over two billion years ago, the meteor/asteroid (estimated to be about six miles in diameter) didn’t do a lot of damage to life on Earth, as there were no multi-cellular organisms around at the time, or things could have gotten dicey. No doubt it adversely affected Earth’s climate at the time — not that anyone noticed, of course.
Today, the original crater is mostly eroded away, but what remains is still impressive when seen from space, and serves as a graphic reminder of just how scary our little corner of the Universe can be.

Top 10 Reasons You Should Respect Nickelback

Nickelback is a running joke in the music industry. If you want to say something sucks, just compare it to Nickelback. For example “Dude, this TopTenz list sucks so hard it automatically made me like Nickelback on Facebook”. However, we feel that this hate is undeserved, so here are 10 reasons you should at the very least, give Nickelback a break.

10. They’re consistently on the charts.

One of the the reasons Nickelback leaves such a sour taste in people’s mouths is because they’re everywhere, all the time. But have you ever stopped to wonder why a band that everyone seems to hate is so present in the charts. Well, it’s mainly because Nickelback is one of the best selling bands of recent history, no really. The band has collectively sold in excess of 50 million records, you literally cannot keep them out of the charts. There are virtually no other bands from recent history that have the same consistency as Nickelback.
If success is a measure of talent then Nickelback is the ghost of John Lennon on super LSD (ask your parents if you’re too young or hipster for that reference). Of course, it’s easy to say that this success is because Nickelback is just releasing the same manufactured pop/rock songs every year. Well, here’s the thing..

9. They brought Rock and Roll into the mainstream.

How many rock bands do you know that have had a number 1 hit? The answer will invariably be, not many, rock groups just don’t release number 1 hits, unless they’re Nickelback. Which is when someone exclaims that Nickelback isn’t a rock group, well, they’re a band with guitars drums and a negative amount of auto-tune. If they’re not rock and roll, they’re as close as we’re ever going to get until we figure out how to clone the Beatles.
As billboard notes, “How You Remind Me” was the first rock track to peak at number one since that awful “Butterfly” song. Even if you dislike Nickelback, you have to admit any band that can make it into the top 10 without auto tune is at the very least proving that guitars are rad. Oh and for all you people still saying Nickelback isn’t a rock group…

8. They’re actually metal as all hell.

The thing is, most people will have probably heard only a few of Nickelback’s songs, and as such, judge them purely on those few songs. However, if you ever took the time to listen to Side of a Bullet, you probably noticed that it’s way heavier than any of the band’s more commercial stuff. You probably also noticed the fact that it contained a kick-ass guitar solo. Well that solo was actually ripped by guitar legend Dimebag Darrel.
If you’re wondering why they let Kroeger use the solo it’s because Dimebag Darrel was a huge fan of the band. Darrel was introduced to Kroeger by Jerry Cantrell (an ex Alice in Chains guitarist) and after a few drinks the entire group gushed to Kroeger how they were all big fans of Nickelback. That’s the guitarists of three bands heavier than a Texas schoolchild (Pantera, Damageplan and Alice in Chains) all singing their praise. If that’s still not metal enough for you, just consider that Chad Kroeger AKA the face of Nickelback also worked on an album with another legend of the neck, Carlos Santana. So before you try to say that Nickelback sucks, just realise that one of the finest and most metal guitarists to have ever live played a solo on one of their songs from beyond the grave. How metal is that?

7. They’ve openly allowed people to challenge and beat them.

It’s a oft repeated joke that in the early days of Rock Band, they called it Rock Band Nickelback to ensure journalists never bothered to look into the game. Then again, how many of you reading this think you could play better than Nickelback? Well, Nickelback as an entity decided to give fans and non-fans a chance to prove this when they released the game Nickelback Revenge for the iPhone.
The game featured a mode in which you could challenge the band members’ own high scores. thus allowing every person out there who disliked the band to have the ability to say, I’m better than Nickelback, if they so wanted. Truly a gift to cherish because when it comes down to it…

Top 10 Most Bizarre Events To Ever Occur During A Baseball Game

While many people celebrate professional baseball’s greatest home runs, or its best players, we choose to honor the wackiest, most ridiculous, or downright embarrassing things to happen during a game. Some of these, many would like to forget, but we won’t let them.

10. Plague of Midges

The Cleveland Indians baseball stadium, and much of Cleveland itself, is built by a lake, which often leads to some strange problems. In a playoff game between the New York Yankees and the Cleveland Indians, thousands of midges came out of the lake in huge numbers and affected the course of the game. Though they’re generally harmless, the sheer swarm seriously tweaked Yankees pitcher Joba Chamberlain to the point that he could not concentrate. The bugs ended up swinging the game for the Indians, who ended up winning their series against the Yankees. Talk about home field advantage.

9. A No-Hitter Pitched While On LSD

Dock Ellis was having a normal day, hanging out with a friend of his and doing all the drugs, especially LSD. Suddenly, his girlfriend read in the newspaper that Ellis was supposed to be pitching for the Pittsburgh Pirates that day. Despite needing to catch an afternoon flight, and running late, Ellis made it to the stadium, and proceeded to light up the opposition. While lit up himself.
Ellis became the first (and, as far as we know, only) pitcher to pull off a no-hitter while tripping the light fantastic. In fact, Ellis was so high, he didn’t even know he was pitching a no-hitter, and interpreted his teammates’ silence as disapproval for his druggie life. In fact, they were simply observing an age-old tradition of not speaking to a pitcher during a no-hit bid, so as not to break the pitcher’s concentration.

8. Potato Baseball

Dave Bresnahan played for a minor league team, and was a bit of a practical joker. He stayed up all night, slowly and intricately carving a potato into a perfect replica of a baseball. Then the next day he put his plan into play; there was a runner on third, and he threw the fake ball into the outfield. The runner came home, and was tagged out with the real ball that Bresnahan still had in his hand. The umpire quickly figured out what happened, and was not at all pleased. He ruled the runner safe at home, and Bresnahan was fired from the team shortly after. While he may have lost his job as a baseball player, he still regularly gets mail from fans of his admittedly-clever potato gag.

7. Bird Interference

Legendary player Randy Johnson was pitching a preseason game, and what had to have been the unluckiest bird in history decided to get right in front of a pitch. If you see it right in front of you it’s astounding; the ball releases, and then a puff of feathers fills the air. But in the video below you can see it in slow motion, as the bird flies across the plate and then turns into a shower of feathers:

6. Player Starts A Riot With Heckling Fans

Normally, it’s the fans that start a riot with each other, or with the players. In this case, however, things took a turn for the bizarre. The Texas Rangers were playing against the Oakland A’s, whose fans are known for being extremely belligerent. The heckling from the A’s fans got so bad, that a Ranger pitcher completely lost his temper and went on the attack, throwing a metal folding chair into the stands, and launching himself at the fans. The unrest between the fans and the players was so bad, that the umpires were considering calling the game as a forfeit, and just clearing out the whole stadium to avoid any further trouble. The fan who was hit with the chair got a broken nose and an out-of-court settlement out of the deal.

5. Back-To-Back Home Runs Off The Same Foul Pole

In the same game, back in July 2012, so many odds were defied, that it is hard to calculate. First, one home run was hit off of a foul pole. And then later on in the game, another home run hit the exact same foul pole. Apparently the last time this happened was in the year 2000, which was when they first started recording home runs that were hit off foul poles. The odds boggle the mind; perhaps baseball is actually played by wizards.

4. Playing A Useless Game Through Serious Injury

It’s one thing to play through injury during an important game, but how about when it truly could not matter less if you played or not? Such was the case during an all-star game played by Red Sox legend Ted Williams. Being an all-star game, the outcome, and who contributed to it, didn’t matter in the least. Yet Williams, after breaking his left elbow during a catch early on in the game, still continued playing for seven innings after. Not only that but, even after he broke his elbow, he made an important catch, and hit a single that put his team ahead.

3. Rain Delay In A Domed Stadium

It doesn’t make sense that you should have a rain delay in a stadium with a retractable dome, but that actually ended up happening in Toronto, in the middle of a Blue Jays game, back in 1989. The stadium management was not prepared for the weather, expecting a mere light drizzle, and so they didn’t close the roof of the stadium. Then the drizzle turned into a torrential downpour, and they were left with a delayed game and a lot of angry fans who were not exactly expecting such an utterly avoidable snafu. It turns out that the dome cannot close safely if there are high winds, which happens to be a common thing during storms. Perhaps they should have closed it anyway, since they expected rain and all, but that probably would have been too simple.

2. Manager In Disguise

Bobby Valentine has been involved in baseball for a long time, and has always been a little eccentric, but during one game, whie he was manager of the New York Mets, he took it to the next level. It started with him getting ejected from a game for arguing with an umpire, which is a pretty normal occurrence in baseball. However, Valentine was not content sitting this game out, and decided that he still needed to be around to keep things going properly. While a sane manager might have tried to coach things using a phone, or perhaps some other clever trick, he had other ideas. Valentine put on a fake mustache, and returned to the dugout, which can be seen in the video below:

He was suspended and fined for his joke, but it definitely goes down as one of the goofiest moments in sports history. We can’t help but feel that he could have come up with a better disguise than a fake mustache. Like just about anything else.

1. Bill Veeck’s Entire Career

Bill Veeck was, by far, the most insane owner in the history of baseball, and was better than anyone at getting people out to the park. Among his antics, he brought midgets in as a gimmick, and sometimes held weddings on the field. He offered prizes of live animals, and once awarded a 200-pound block of ice, which hopefully the recipient had a use for. He also once gave his team manager a gigantic birthday cake except, instead of the usual pretty lady you would expect to pop out, a new player made an appearance instead. Thankfully, said new player was not wearing

Top 10 Most Important Mario Characters

Mario, one of the most popular video game characters today. Mario has been from jumping over barrels to running all around the world for saving a princess, racing in little karts on many different tracks, flying around the universe for collecting lost stars, competing in the Olympics with Sonic, etc. The games he’s been starred in include Super Mario Bros, Mario Kart, Super Mario World, Super Mario Galaxy, Super Mario Sunshine, Mario Party, and a whole bunch of others. Obviously he didn’t make it here all by himself. He had to had some help from a lot of other characters. They have a load of importance for Mario’s existence. And with this said, I give you the list of the 10 characters whom Mario never could have made it without.

Just a heads-up: Mario himself will be on this list, but I’m not going to make it cheesy with him being #1. I have my reasoning.

10. Lakitu

Lakitu is that koopa on the smiling cloud. So what makes him so important? He’s just the annoying jerk who throws spiky balls at you that turn into Spinies when they hit the ground! Well, honestly, I have to agree that Lakitu is just a freaking pain! But, when he’s not throwing Spinies at you, he’s either your personal camera man on Super Mario 64 or the race starter in any Mario Kart game. How can you see mario on the screen when there’s no camera man? How can you start a race without someone to hold out the starting light? Then again, there is the very annoying factor of him, which is why I put him so far back on the list.

9. Luigi

Luigi, as everybody knows, is Mario’s little brother. Now, I bet you’re all freaking out and raging at me for putting him so far back on the list. Well, hear me out. Sure, he has been with and fought along side Mario for his whole life. Also, he is kind and generous and has a great personality. He is the favorite of many, MANY Mario fans. But, let’s look on the lines of video game logic. Mario didn’t really NEED a brother. The creators just thought it would be nicer for Mario to have someone to take on his adventures with. Just think about it! If Luigi didn’t exist in the first place, meaning that nobody ever knew about him, it wouldn’t have an extremely bad effect on Mario or his fans. Now, this doesn’t necessarily mean I have a grudge against Luigi. I am just stating facts, not opinions. Actually, in my opinion, I think Luigi is just epic!

8. Goomba

Goomba is the first little baddie featured in any Mario game (not including the barrels from Donkey Kong). I honestly have no idea what to compare him to. I guess he would be some kind of two-legged mushroom with upside-down fangs. What’s so great about a small, weak, pointless, annoying little pest? Well, if you’re smart enough to realize that the goomba is the basis of all the baddies in many Mario games, then you know exactly why it’s on this list. The goomba represents all of the obstacles in the way of your big adventure to save Princess Peach. What the hell is a video game without something trying to get in your way?

7. The Koopalings

These are the koopalings, and they are Bowser’s kids. They are a major factor in games like Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Mario World, and Super Mario Bros. Wii, as they are the bosses in each castle before getting to Bowser and his big hell of a castle. There are Larry, Wendy, Lemmy, Iggy, Morton Jr, Roy, and Ludwig. Larry is the youngest; he’s the one with the blue mohawk. Wendy is obviously the girl among them. Lemmy is the one with the colorful mohawk and no teeth. Iggy is the the one with the green explosion hair and the freaky-looking eyes. Morton Jr. is the gray tough-looking one. Roy is the one with the pink head and sunglasses. Ludwig is the oldest; he’s the one with the long dark-blue hair and the middle tooth. Without the koopalings, who knows what Super Mario Bros. 3 and the games after it would be like, if they would’ve even been made at all?

6. Toad

This little mushroom kid is one of many who live their life as servants for Princess Peach. To some, he is extremely fun and adorable. To others, he is that dumb little idiot who tells you that Peach isn’t there when you get to the end of a Bowser castle and then FLIPS YOU OFF. To those people who look at him this way, they wonder how he got on this list in the first place, especially more into it than Luigi! Well, let’s face it. If Toad wasn’t there to tell you at the end of each castle that Peach isn’t there, then how are you going to find out where she went? And no, she wouldn’t automatically be there. Obviously, it would still be where she would be taken to another castle. The only difference is that you wouldn’t have known! So, how are you going to save her if you don’t even know where she is?? Now, on another note, I could say that this right here could get people a little flared:

5. Princess Toadstool (Peach)

Princess Peach is the ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom. She has been featured in every single Mario game that has been made (as far as I know). Occasionally, she gets kidnapped by an evil villain, usually Bowser, and gets saved by Mario. Of course, she is popular, but why is she so important? The answer is so simple and so obvious that even a 3-year-old would know it if they were asked this question. PEACH IS THE ONE MARIO HAS TO SAVE. In nearly all Mario games! I mean, seriously, is it really that hard to figure out? What the hell is a Mario game without a princess to save!?

4. Bowser

Bowser, as everyone knows, is the main villain of the average Mario game. The reason to why he is so important is also as clear as the look on somebody’s face when they just got an 18% out of 100% on a kindergarten-level spelling test (where this simile came from, I have no idea). All it takes is just 4 words: He. Is. The. Villain. There cannot simply be a Mario game in existence without a main villain to try to ruin your day. Just imagine a Mario game without a main villain. It would be like trying to save Peach from NOTHING. I don’t see how she can be kidnapped from nothing, and I also don’t see how Mario can save Peach if she’s not even being kidnapped by anything.

3. Yoshi

Yoshi is probably one of the most popular and favorite Mario characters in existence, next to Luigi. He is also one of my personal favorites. Now, the question to ask here is how is he more important than Princess Peach AND Bowser? Well, there are 2 ways of looking at it. The first way is the way we’ve been looking at it with all of the other Mario characters on this list: by the actual games. This time, we’re going to look at it by Mario’s personal history instead of the games. Let’s go back to when Mario was just a little bitty baby in the game Yoshi’s Island. He was being flown along with Baby Luigi in a bag by a stork to their parents’ home. But, tragically, the stork was attacked by Kamek in an attempt to kidnap the 2 baby siblings. Luigi and the stork were both kidnapped, but Mario on the other hand was missed by Kamek, and he fell all the way down to Yoshi’s Island. Now, this is where Yoshi himself comes in. When little Baby Mario fell, Yoshi broke his fall by catching him on his back. He got the feeling that the little guy got lost. So, Yoshi and his friends went on a journey to go find Luigi and the stork and get them back to their home. It is very, very important to consider this little story. If Yoshi didn’t exist, it would be a BIG possibility that Mario would’ve never grown up to be such a hero if Yoshi hadn’t have rescued him in the first place, meaning that if these 2 ways of looking at Mario were combined, there would be NO Mario game in existence, which means it would’ve been like Mario never existed in the first place.

2. Mario

Mario. The one that this list is based off of in the first place. He has been in every game based off of him that has ever been made (like I really needed to state this fact). Now obviously, if Mario didn’t exist, then none of his games would exist either. That means none of the Mario characters would exist either. That ALSO means that the Mario characters on this list wouldn’t exist. Hell, this list or anything else concerning Mario would’ve ever exist in the first place. Let’s just put it at that. Well, I guess that ends this list of…wait…Mario is number 2? THERE’S SOMEONE MORE IMPORTANT THAN MARIO HIMSELF!?!? Hmm…well…I guess you’re gonna have to scroll down to find out who it is…

1. Donkey Kong

Unexpected, huh? Well, let me explain. Who was the villain in the VERY FIRST Mario game ever made before Bowser? Who was the one who had the title of that game based of his name? Who was the one who started it all? Donkey Kong. He started, not 1, but 2 different game series! He started Mario’s AND his own! But what difference does it make? Wouldn’t it be the same for Mario? He started them both too, didn’t he? How is Donkey Kong more important than Mario? Well, this very good question is answered with these 2 questions right here: Was Donkey Kong featured in any other Mario game? YES. Was Mario featured in any other Donkey Kong game? NO. With this said, Donkey Kong overpowers Mario himself in importance, even in his own game series.

Well, that pretty much covers it! This was my first top 10s list, so comment on what you think I did right and wrong and how I can improve with making more in the future. I hope you enjoyed it!